Show not Tell

This is a show not tell that I did with Sarah.  Show not tell is not tell the reader what going on but putting a clearer image by showing the reader whats going on.

Tell:  The kids were disrespectful to the teacher.

Show:  The kids started screaming above the teacher’s voice, and started sticking out their tongues and started making the teacher mad that she could have popped a vessel. The kids also started throwing paper airplanes and did not listen to the teacher.  

Tell:  The iguana got away.

Show:  The turquoise colored iguana was spinning and turning and started making the boy tired. Then the iguana slithered out of the boys grip and scurried away. It looked back and saw the boy chasing it once more and darted into a tiny crack in a rock.

Tell:  We had fun throwing dead leaves into the fire.

Show:  We threw the dead and dried leaves into the fire and heard the crackling of the leaves burning and disappearing. We could see the black smoke dancing up into the night sky.  All of us stared at the burning leaves.  We threw more in and we started laughing and giggling.

Traveling to My Homeland

This is the first writing sample I wrote for Sarah.

Writing Sample:

Topic Choice:

Write about the most fun trip you have ever had.

My most fun trip I had was when i went to Korea when I was in 5th grade. it was a fun trip and i got to see my siblings and relatives a lot. All my siblings lived in Korea so i was really happy and it was a good time. One of the things i liked that i did with my cousins were. So we went to a water park and we stay in a hotel for maybe, like 3 days and we had a ton of fun. Another thing i liked about Korea was we were stuck there because something about a job visa and i had to go to school for about 3 months. I met a ton of friends and almost everyday after school i hang out after school and we either just talked, play dodge ball, and play soccer. Well when we came back i was happy and sad for many different reasons. I was happy that i was back home, also because my friends were apparently worried about me so when i came back they were all happy. I was also sad because i will miss my friends that i made in Korea, and i couldn’t see my siblings in a long time again.